My Very First Blog Post
Welcome to my private corner of the World Wide Web where faith, books, and real people collide into an Unscripted Exchange!
“Unscripted” because there is no hidden agenda, a secret intention or an ulterior motive. My written words simply “speak” out of the abundance of my heart.
“Exchange” because I hope that the views expressed on the pages of this blog will raise questions, provoke thoughts and inspire a dialogue - an exchange - to take place in the readers’ minds; the dialogues with their own hearts, with their God, with those around them.
Who Am I?
I figured in my very first blog post I should expand a little more about who I am and why I am writing this blog. However, this task turned out to be harder than I anticipated.
How do you sum up someone's life, someone's personality, someone's essence in a number of words and sentences that another person would be willing to read and contemplate?
How do you write about yourself when, somewhere midway through your life, God decides to strip you off your good old identity, comfortable and well broken-in, while a new one hasn't had a chance to emerge yet?
Long time ago I used to be a daughter and a sister; I used to be a student; I used to be a teacher; I used to be a dreamer; I used to be strong; I used to be athletic; I used to be adventurous; I used to be unstoppable; I used to be self-sufficient; I used to be proud; I used to be healthy...
These things are no more. The present seems to be a clean slate. My current list of I "I am-s" is much shorter: I am a mother, I am a wife, I am a reader, sometimes I think I am a writer (but only sometimes).
Above all, I am who God created me to be - His follower, His worshiper, His beloved, His child. The rest remains to be discovered.
So why am I writing this blog?
There are two reasons. The obvious, and the selfish one, is to give an outlet to my thoughts and reflections, to release the tension and to ease the burden placed on me by the often emerging urge to write.
There is a Latin expression "In Retentis." If translated literally it means "among things held back." In legal profession it is often used to describe the documents kept separately from the regular records of a court for special reasons.
"In Retenis" - among things held back.
Just like that, this blog will be comprised of "things" that were held back from the regular "records" of my life; things that have never been spoken out loud, but that remain loud enough in my heart to just keep them there.
There is no story, just a collection of passages. Passages written at different times and different stages of my life, in different places, different countries and continents, addressed to different people, inspired by different events, surrounded by different circumstances.
On the first glance it may even appear that these pieces of writing have little or nothing in common, except that they all, one way of another, are the reflection my life. They are my thoughts quickly scribbled on pieces of paper and safely tucked away for no one to find, almost forgotten and left to rest. They are emails that were never meant to be sent that remain buried deep inside the draft folder of my mailbox. They are dreams, revelations, conversations with myself and with my God typed up on my computer or even "thumbed" on my phone in the middle of the night as I was awakened by a sudden impulse to write, write, write...
There is another reason why I am writing this blog.
Three years ago a sudden chronic illness literally overnight changed my life and the lives of those around me. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD is one of the most misunderstood and most under researched illnesses today. This diagnosis caused me to reevaluate my priorities, to reexamine my values, to rethink my very existence. I wish I could say that all of these trials are in the past. But no, I am still reevaluating, still reexamining, still rethinking, still trying to come to terms with my new life.
A new vocabulary found its way into my life - chronic pain, depression, anxiety, disability. I really hope that by writing about my journey in this blog - about my struggles, my frustrations, my desperation, but also about my faith in God, my hopes, my strategies to cope, my new dreams and new beginnings - will help someone else to cope with a similar situation, will ease someone else's anxiety and will make someone else feel less alone on the path allotted to them by God.
Unscripted Exchange is a place where I share my life Journey of Faith, the journey that took me through many Valleys of Shadow as well as Green Pastures and Quiet Waters. It is the journey that I pray will inspire the reader to look for God’s Goodness and Presence in every circumstance of their life.
It is the Journey on which our Past does not define us, our Present does not limit us and our Future has Hope.
Check out ABOUT page to learn more about me :)